Life’s Subtle Reminders

Not long ago I moved to Central Florida for a new job and a new environment. Nothing about my time down here has been normal for me. Immediately I began to miss my family, apartment, job, friends, and of course my normal routine. I was ready to hop in my car and head back home, I wanted my life back. Where I wanted to go still felt like home in a sense, but didn’t feel like home anymore. Why? Who knows. I couldn’t, I still don’t understand why god has rearranged my life. I will let you know as soon as I find out.

How important is family? You begin to ask yourself that every single day. I’ve only lived in Central Florida for two months and have already had a few hiccups. My uncle became hospitalized, one died, and my step sister passed. All of this makes a person want to run back to normal, to feel apart of the fold, to help everyone cope. I can’t. Being so far away makes you realize you can’t run home for everything, but you must choose what emergencies are biggest. So today I’m heading back home to support more dad as we burry my step sister, his first daughter. What they say is true, tragedy makes you want to become closer to everyone and forgive everyone too. What I’ve realized is that while back home I never had my own life, I was going through the motions of life, but not doing everything I dreamt of doing. I need to find a balance between being me and sort of appeasing the people most important to me.

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